Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I actually pay taxes

Farewell to the Penny — A Tiny Coin’s Outsized Legacy - PYMNTS.com

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I can count

I understand how hurricane paths work

Have you or anyone you know invested in cryptocurrencies before? If so, which one did you invest in and how much profit did you make?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

‘This is a tragedy:’ UW doctor pushes back against RFK Jr.’s COVID vaccine recommendations - MyNorthwest.com

I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Megyn Kelly: Meghan Markle's Pregnancy Post Disrespects Childbirth - TheWrap

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Playdate’s second season is off to a great (and very weird) start - The Verge

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Procter & Gamble to cut 7,000 jobs as part of broader restructuring - CNBC

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

‘It Is Going to Happen’: JPMorgan CEO Jamie Dimon Warns of Crack in the Bond Market - Barron's

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Why prices from these cities in Utah and Nebraska won't be included in inflation data - NPR

I don’t cotton to rapists

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

Does Donald Trump have low self-esteem?

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Broadcom Stock Falls Despite Earnings Beat From AI Chip Maker - Barron's

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I see through liars

Former Red Sox All-Star Designated For Assignment One Day After Season Debut - NESN

I can read

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

Adventure Calls from the Lost City of Un’Goro, Hearthstone’s Next Expansion - Blizzard Entertainment

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I have complete contempt for fakery

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones